Visit with the perinatologist

A little overdue. I had an appt. at the MFM practice on the 14th. I had been anxious about how I was going to find a specialist and how to get a referral since I'm not seeing an obstetrician. I e-mailed one in town about my situation and he agreed to set up a referral even though I was not his patient. I was quite surprised.

I was a ball of nerves that day. I was so anxious and excited to see him and see how he was doing, but then I was nervous about the actual ultrasound and whether something would be found. I first met with the genetic counselor and she was very nice and understanding. After meeting with her I met up with the u/s tech and she was great. She took her time and told me everything she was doing and I asked questions. A lot of things looked familiar to me from all the other ultrasounds I've had in the past. She told me that everything looked good to her, but the doctor would be coming in to check some things out and talk with me. There goes those nerves again.

The doctor asked a lot of questions about my pregnancy history and I told her about Duncan's complications. She took her time goinf over his heart. I held my breath a couple times because she'd spend her time focusing on one view of the heart. Good thing all is okay. She did bring another doctor in to see if he could get a better view of the heart because little Grayson was in a funky position. According to the u/s tech and perinatologists he's looking great. He was estimated the weigh 1 lb. The u/s tech was really nice. The entire ultrasound lasted about an hour. It was pretty detailed, which was reassurring for me.

They want me to come back in a couple weeks so they can get a particular view of the heart. Yay for a good ultrasound!!!

Gender Preference and . . .

Disappointment. The feelings involved in gender preference and disappointment are very real.

We find out the sex on Saturday, in two days, and I'm SO nervous. Since the beginning of this pregnancy I have kept thinking boy because this pregnancy reminds me so much of my pregnancy with Duncan. I'm getting total boy vibes. My intuition was right with my others, but I'm not so confident now. I've been preparing myself to hear "girl," and as much as I try to be as excited and happy about the prospects of another girl, it's hard. I try to think about the positive aspects of having another girl, but I can't help but yearn for a boy. I wanted a boy with Duncan and I got him, but in the end, I didn't get to keep him. =(

It doesn't help that I think I see a boy nub in the NT scan picture. I don't want to get my hopes up, though. I'd love to experience a mother & son relationship. Just two more days! Ack!